Sunday School: Part 1 of the Doctrines, Beliefs, and Practices of the Reformed Tradition

As I mentioned in my previous post, my family has been members of one of the most strict and conservative fundamentalist evangelical churches for generations. These are the legacies which I was given to accept as the truth and facts about a Supreme Being: The God of the Christian Bible.

I started my education of Calvinist doctrines from an early age beginning with "Sunday School". The education, or indoctrination as I prefer to call it originates with all the well-known Bible stories. Examples of these stories include The Creation, Noah and the Flood, Joseph and his multi-colored coat, David and Goliath, Jonah and the Great Fish, and the birth of Jesus. As I got older, I learned the more violent stories which included Samson and his slaughter of the Philistines, Joshua and the Battle of Jericho, The Exodus and the plagues inflicted on the Egyptians, Daniel in the Lion's Den, Daniel's friends in the fiery furnace, the execution of Jesus, and much more.

(These are Gustave Dore images which are in the public domain)

The actual killing of people was minimized and often overlooked. Explanations like "those people were evil, or they're not God's Chosen people or they didn't obey God and deserved it" were often given. For children, whose brains are still developing and do not yet understand such brazen acts of execution, they can not possibly comprehend the meaning and doctrines behind these stories. They only see people dying and don't want that to happen to themselves.

In fact, it is my assertion that these stories lay the foundations of fear which these precious children carry with them for life. Thoughts, worries, and the anxiety of ending up in hell at my death, had been the most fundamental persuading factor which kept me bound to the Christian Religion, specifically to my Calvinist beliefs.

This fear of going to Hell was central to persuading people to live upright and obedient lives following what was taught in Sunday School, preached at church services, and maintained in study groups and classes. About the age of 10, I began attending catechism classes once a week. These classes were where we would study the doctrines and history of the Protestant church, particularly the Reformed tradition. We learned about all the Confessions, Creeds, and people who were part of the Protestant Reformation. (you can read more about the Protestant Reformation in the previous post)

The most fear which was publicly evident was from the pulpit on Sundays. Every so often, the pastor would preach what was known as the "fire and brimstone" sermons. When I think back on those days, I recall how much we hated those sermons. Scaring people into believing in God just didn't seem right to me, even as a teenager. We also felt we didn't need to hear them because, by this age, we already adhered to the "true beliefs" that we had been taught since preschool.

I think that these fear driven beliefs cause irreparable harm to the believer's psyche and ensure that they will keep attending and supporting the church, usually for their entire lives. The worry about sinning by not having a pure enough life and heading to an eternal torment is enough to keep them coming back for more. Of course, there are also many other reasons for supporting the church. For my family, it was part of our tradition. It's what you did on Sunday. We went to church, usually twice (morning and evening) in support of our church.

Christian School Education picked up where the church left off. We took Bible classes in every grade in addition to Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic. These were schools of the Christian Reformed Church and were financially supported by them, in addition to tuition.

As you can see, it truly is a lifelong indoctrination, when you are a child born into that faith. I don't know how it is with other religions, but I do believe it is very similar in teaching their children from an early age. We never questioned what we learned and always assumed everything to be true. The sad part of it all, is that children are never taught to question things or to think for themselves or to form their own opinions and beliefs. I always have had an inquiring mind and wondered (to myself) whether some of these miraculous stories and beliefs, actually happened or not. But, the fear of going to hell always brought me back home to where I was most comfortable: the beliefs of our family. One hymn we sang in church proclaimed this fact that indeed it is the "faith of our fathers" The last line of each verse sums it up for me in that must always hold true the faith of our fathers:

Faith of our fathers! Holy Faith!
We will be true to thee 'till death!

{Lyrics by Frederick William Faber (1814-1863)}

DL

Next up: What are these Doctrines that the Calvinist believes?

A Very Brief History of The Reformed Tradition's Roots: From The Netherlands to America

In my profile, I touched on a few highlights of my background. In the next few blogs, I would like to give more details of my religious upbringing and the history of religion in my family. It will help the reader understand what I have believed and what this Church holds to be true. These next few posts may be boring for those who don't like history, but it is necessary to provide a background to the origins of my religious faith.

My research into my family genealogy is what prompted me to question the validity of the Bible and Christianity. As I researched my ancestors, I explored the history of the Netherlands and how Christianity influenced the Dutch people, which is the primary ethnicity of my family. Most of my ancestors lived in the Province of Groningen in the Northern part of the Netherlands.

The Protestant Reformation

My family has been members of one of the most conservative evangelical branches of Christianity for generations. Theses denominations are the Reformed Church in America and the Christian Reformed Church. The greatest influence upon these two denominations is John Calvin and his writings. Calvin was an influential French theologian during the Protestant Reformation, which began with Martin Luther's rejection of some of the practices of the Roman Catholic Church in Germany in the 1520s.

Martin Luther - 1529

John Calvin was born in Geneva, Switzerland as Jehan Cauvin in 1509. Calvin left the Roman Catholic Church in the 1530s and published his most prominent work the "Institutes of the Christian Religion" in 1536.

John Calvin - abt. 1550

Calvinism in the Netherlands

Calvin's brand of the Reformation appeared in the Netherlands in the 1540s concentrating in the western and northern areas, where my ancestors lived. The Dutch Reformed Church or the Nederlandse Hervormde Kerk was established in 1571. There was much persecution of religious groups over the next sixty years until independence in the Netherlands was achieved in 1648. The Netherlands was known at that time for its religious tolerance, as there were groups of Catholics, Anabaptists, Anglicans, Jews, and Calvinists. 

On a side note, the year 1806 is crucial, especially for Dutch genealogy. Napolean set up the Kingdom of Holland, and he gave it to his brother Louis I to rule it. As a result, people were required to register with the state using last names. I discovered these facts while researching my genealogy. Before this time, most families did not have last names. Genealogy research in Holland before 1806 is much more challenging, and most records are from Churches.

Louis Napoleon Bonaparte

In 1813, Napoleon's army was defeated at the Battle of Leipzig. Following that defeat, his troops retreated to France from all over Europe. In 1815, Willem Frederik from the house of Orange proclaimed himself the ruler over the Sovereign Principality of the Netherlands after the Napoleonic Kingdom of Holland had dissolved. Willem was the son of Willem V, the last monarch before his exile due to Napoleon's French Revolution and the Bavarian Revolution in Amsterdam. In 1815, Willem proclaimed the country a Kingdom, and from that day on has been known as the Kingdom of the Netherlands. He then changed his name to Willem I. The Kingdom of the Netherlands at that time, consisted of the Northern Netherlands (Holland) who were mostly Protestant and the Southern Netherlands (Belgium) who were Catholics. 

Willem Frederik - William I

In 1816, Willem I reorganized the Dutch Reformed church, which had been the country's official religion up until 1798. He renamed it the Nederlands Gereformeerde Kerk or the Netherlands Reformed Church, and it remained the country's most influential Protestant Church. Willem I was a staunch supporter of the Reformed Church which led to clashes between the liberal Calvinists, Orthodox Calvinists, and Catholics.

In 1834, a group of orthodox Calvinists led by the Reverand Hendrik de Cock seceded from the Netherlands Reformed Church. Other churches joined Rev. de Cock in seceding from the Church and formed the Christian Reformed Churches in the Netherlands. These groups were known as the Secessionists or Seceders.

Hendrik de Cock 1829

Calvinism in the United States

In September of 1846, Albertus Van Raalte who was a secessionist pastor, his family, and a group of about 50 others fled the Netherlands because of famine and religious persecution. They traveled through New York on their way to establish a colony in Wisconsin. On the way going to Wisconsin, they came upon Black Lake in Western Michigan and decided to settle there instead. They began settling in and around this area in February of 1847. It eventually became the city of Holland, Michigan. 

Albertus Van Raalte 

The task of starting a colony there wasn't easy. Many settlers were inexperienced, and the forests on the land needed clearing before they could begin farming. The first years were difficult due to disease and the difficulty of making a living off the undeveloped land. Van Raalte looked to the Dutch Reformed congregations in the New Jersey area for help and eventually joined the American branch of the Dutch Reformed Church in 1850. These New Jersey groups were part of the Reformed churches that formed in New Amsterdam in 1628. 

In July of 1847, Gijsbert Haan and his family left the Netherlands following Van Raalte's lead, and stayed in the New Amsterdam area for a time before heading to Michigan. While living in New York, his thinking was shaped by a group known as the True Protestant Dutch Reformed Church, which had seceded from the American Dutch Reformed Church in 1822. The seceders felt that the American church didn't follow Calvin's teachings and that they were only semi-Calvinists with unsound practices. 

Gijsbert Haan

When Haan and his family finally reached Van Raalte and the colony in Michigan, he began exerting his influence on what he had learned in New York. Most churches in Holland were happy with their union with the Dutch Reformed Church. But he kept pushing for separation due to what he called the unsound practices of the church. Van Raalte had wanted the settlers to become "good Americans" and to assimilate into the American culture. He and most of his followers were open to the adaptation of the church as well to Americanization, including a transition to conducting services in English, cooperating with other denominations in the production of Sunday School materials, and maintaining the connection to the Reformed Churches in the East. Haan and his followers were pushing for isolationism. They felt that by isolating themselves from others, they would be stronger and not lose their ties to the Netherlands. Additionally, there were a few doctrinal issues that they disagreed with, but the primary thrust of seceding was more about conduct and non-theological issues.

Soon, he had enough followers and on March 19, 1857, he and a significant portion of the Second Reformed Church in Grand Rapids, including its pastor, agreed to secede, and they formed the First Christian Reformed Church of Grand Rapids. Six weeks later, members from four churches, consisting of about 130 families joined them and formed the Christian Reformed Church Denomination (CRC) on April 29, 1857. 

According to the CRC website (www.crcna.org), the reasons for the 1857 secession were:

• a perceived lack of piety and too much accommodation to American culture by these same pastors;
• the use of hymns in worship by the Americans - the seceders insisted on psalm-singing only;
• the practice by the American churches of "open communion," extending an open invitation to all believers to participate in the Lord's Supper;
• the perceived lack of solidarity on the part of the Americans with the secessionist cause in the Netherlands. *

The Christian Reformed Church also promotes the importance of Christian Education of their children and even requires it for some. For example, if someone works at one of their schools, it is mandatory that their children attend a CRC Christian school. Because of this vigorous insistence on Christian education, the CRC has established many Christian schools across the country.

The Reformed Church doesn't own as many lower education parochial schools as the CRC, but there are a few Christian colleges in the Midwest, including Hope College in Holland, Central, and Northwestern Colleges in Iowa.

Next up:  Doctrines, Beliefs, and Practices of the Reformed Tradition

DL

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1 History | Christian Reformed Church, https://www.crcna.org/welcome/history (accessed August 05, 2016).

Judaism, Christianity, & Islam: Common Roots

I took some time off from the blog, unintentionally, because I got caught up with all the politics and campaigns going on in July. What a complete mess! Anyways, I'm back and I will try to blog more often.

Previous blogs gave stats on the World's Religions and a bit about their Origins. I want to concentrate mainly on Christianity, Islam, and Judaism. These three religious groups comprise over half the world's population and they share foundational roots, that being the Abrahamic tradition. For those not familiar with this term, Judaism's story begins with Abram, later known as Abraham. Supposedly, the one and only true God chose Abram and made a covenant with him. He promised Abram that he would have as many descendants as the stars, and God would give them some land in the Middle East, known later as the "Promised Land".

Judaism, the religion of Abram's descendants, for all intensive purposes started with Moses. Moses and God had a personal relationship and the Bible says that they spoke to each other all the time. God gave Moses a bunch of laws, rules, and practices that the Israelites had to follow. If they didn't, the penalty in many cases was death. The most famous of all these laws, which most people are familiar with, is the Ten Commandments.

Judaism produced the Hebrew Bible, on which the Old Testament of the Bible is primarily based. 

Christianity produced the Bible consisting of the Old and New Testaments. Christians believe the Bible is the inspired words of God.

Islam believes only in the Torah (the first five books of the Old Testament), and the Psalms as inspired, along with their holy book the Qur'an or Koran, which was produced by Muhammad.

Since these three religions all have a common foundation built on the first five books of the Bible, I will narrow my focus to these five books of Moses, or the Torah. Genesis is the foundational book of the Bible, and this is where I will begin my study. What better place to start than the beginning of a book?

Before I begin sharing my research on Genesis, I want to give you some more background on myself, more detailed than what is shown in my profile. I will post this in the next blog.

DL

What are the Origins of all these Religions??

The Origins of Religions

Definition of religion: 

Religion is:

• The belief and worship of a superhuman controlling power, especially a personal god or gods
• A particular system of faith and worship
• A pursuit or interest to which someone ascribes supreme importance

So, when did religion or religions first start? First off, I will look at the origins of the top five religions that still are in existence today. In future writings, I will explore the very beginnings of religion or as the case may be the invention of it.

One caveat, I will NOT be assuming here that Christianity is the one true religion and that it is the first and only origin of true religions. The reason being, is that I must look at it objectively, not with the assumption that Christianity or the Bible has all the answers to its origins.

Therefore, I will look for any and all known indicators for the origins of these religions, that has been shown to be accurate, or at least mostly accurate.

Calendar Definitions

I will use the terms BCE and CE to describe the eras of time prescribed by the Gregorian calendar (Before the Common Era and Common Era) rather than BC and AD. These terms are outdated and give preference to the Christian religion in dating time. Other religions have their own calendars as well, but I will use the above terms as they are understood by most people, and the Gregorian calendar has the most widespread usage today.

Here's the top five religions in terms of prominence and longevity, in no particular order. These are only the known origins and beginnings of these religions. Obviously there is much more history to what makes them what they appear to be in today's world. That will be included in my future book!

Judaism:

 Its name is derived from Judah, one of the sons of Jacob, also known later as Israel from the Torah (the first 5 books of the Jewish Bible). Judaism has quite a few points in its history that contributed to its beginnings. First, would be Abram, also known later as Abraham. "God" chose Abram to be father of his covenant nation, theorized to be about 2200 BCE (I have found the year 2165 BCE many times to be the exact year, but who knows). Abram/Abraham's son Isaac, and grandson Jacob/Israel also received this covenant from their God.

For those not familiar with this Covenant, here it is in a nutshell: Abram's descendants would become a great nation (as many as the stars) and they were promised the land of Canaan. All they had to do was follow their God's rules and worship only him. And of course that would mean packing up all his family and stuff, and hiking their way out to this promised Land!

Moses was the next highlight in their history, as he received the Law (rules) of God and brought the people of Israel halfway to Canaan. Then came judges, prophets, and many kings. David and his son Solomon were the most influential kings on the religion. Solomon built the first temple for the people in Jerusalem.

Modern Judaism didn't really begin in a significant way, until the Jewish temple was destroyed by Romans in 70 CE. With their temple gone, the Jewish folks needed to find a way to survive without their rituals, sacrifices, and their temple.

Hinduism:

 Began with people that migrated from Central Asia into India about 1500 BCE. Hinduism was the main religion in the area of present day's India until Buddhism split off into opposite beliefs from it in the 5th or 6th century BCE. (sources are varied)

Buddhism:

   It is mainly an Asian religion that originated in India and is dominant in its original form in SE Asia (areas such as Thailand, Tibet, Korea, China, and Japan). Has its origins in Hinduism. The founder was born Siddhartha Gautama, a royal prince born in the 5th or 6th century BCE. 'Sidd' declared himself the "Buddha" or "the Enlightened One", after wandering the forest and meditating for six or seven years (depending on sources) in search of enlightenment. He finally found it under a tree, the Bodhi Tree.

Christianity:

 Its name comes from Jesus, also known as Christ. It built its foundations on the Jewish Bible, which is the Old Testament only, and the New Testament of today's Bible. Jesus death is thought to be anywhere from 30-36 CE according to most scholars, depending on the dating of his birth. The Christian church originated in the middle of the first century and its attributed beginnings are to Paul, who authored at least 8 and perhaps up to 14 of the books of the New Testament. Paul's letters were written anywhere from 50 to 69 CE.

I don't get hooked into theological arguments or interpretations of what things supposedly mean or the exact dates of events unless warranted. Personally, it is a waste of my time, since people have fought over the Bible's meanings for thousands of years. One blog won't change that! Suffice to say, many people who wrote books in this timeframe were known to have claimed that famous people had authored their book, just to give it some authority. For my purposes here, it doesn't matter if Paul wrote them all or not. They are in the New Testament of the Bible. That's all there is to know.

Islam:

 Founded by Abū al-Qāsim Muḥammad  (known simply as Muhammad) was born about 570 CE in Mecca in present day Saudi Arabia. Islam has roots in Judaism as it is believed that Muhammad's ancestry is from Ishmael, Abram's (Abraham) son with Haggar. Islam originated in 622 CE when Muhammad and his followers left Mecca for Medina, and established the Muslim community there. Muhammad had gained many followers while in Mecca and emigrated with them to Medina in 622 CE. This date is considered the beginning of the Islamic Calendar.

So, there you have it. A short abridged guide to five of today's popular religions' origins.

Back to the World's Religions

I posted previously the Top 8 Religious groups in the world. Click HERE to read it. 

In researching theses religions, I was curious about how many 'active' world religions there are today. It's hard to pinpoint an exact number of religions without narrowing them down by size or popularity. Some sects may be very small or unknown to researchers. It also depends on how you define the religion.

Some religions do share some common roots or beliefs. Judaism, Christianity, Islam, and all have "Abrahamic" roots and have obviously evolved from their common beginning into to very different religions today. Christianity and Islam both evolved as offshoots of Judaism. The others have their roots independently from each other. 

In Christianity, there are 4 major branches: Protestants, Roman Catholics, Orthodox, and Independents. Independents identify themselves as independent of historic, organized, mainstream institutionalized Christian denominations. 

And when you look at these four major branches, there are almost endless denominations split off from the branches. According to the Center for the Study of Global Christianity, there are about 41,000 different Christian denominations worldwide. I have found lists stating anywhere from 20,000 to 41,000 from different sources.

The top 35 denominations, at least in the United States are as follows:*

1. Catholic
2. Baptist
3. Christian (no denomination specified)
4. Methodist
5. Lutheran
6. Presbyterian
7. Protestant
8. Pentecostal/Charismatic
9. Espicopal/Anglican
10. Mormon /Latter-Day Saints
11. Church of Christ
12. Nondenominational
13. Congregational/United Church of Christ
14. Jehovah's Witness
15. Assembly of God
16. Evangelical
17. Church of God
18. Seventh-Day Adventist
19. Eastern Orthodox 
20. Holiness/Holy
21. Church of the Nazarene
22. Disciples of Christ
23. Church of the Brethren
24. Mennonite
25. Reformed/Dutch Reformed
26. Apostolic/New Apostolic
27. Quaker
28. Christian Science
29. Full Gospel
30. Christian Reformed
31. Independent Christian Church
32. Foursquare Gospel
33. Fundamentalist
34. Born Again
35. Salvation Army

*This list is from a 2001 American Religious Identification Survey conducted by the Graduate Center of the University of New York.

These are only the largest denominations and do not include all the branches which split from these 35 main branches.

So what are we to make of all of this? I would suggest that all these different denominations came about because everyone has different interpretations of the Bible. This has caused so many disagreements, arguments, and even wars because of all the passionate beliefs of it's members, and especially the leaders. 

To put it another way, the members tend to believe what they are told by the priests, ministers, pastors, leaders, and those 'in authority' over the denominations (I think of the Pope as an example of one man yielding extraordinary influence). Traditions play an important role in forming these beliefs as well. I can't count how many times I've heard, "But we always have done it this way. My grandparents, my parents, and now my family. And you want to change everything now?" Inevitably this leads to secessions and splits of which I am very familiar. 

My premises come from the Dutch Reformed tradition, in which I grew up with, and my parents, and grandparents, and great grandparents, etc. The Christian Reformed Church (CRC) split from the Reformed Church in America (RCA) in 1857, shortly after a multitude of Dutch people emigrated to America. If you can believe it, some of the reasons for the split, was that the RCA congregations were singing man-made hymns instead of Psalms, didn't preach catechism as much as was preferred, they let non-Reformed people partake in the Lord's Supper, and permitted membership in the Masonic lodges. 

We are talking some serious disagreements here, aren't we??? It's almost laughable!

Anyway, They seceded from the Reformed Church, made themselves the Psalter Hymnal, and restricted all kinds of behavior and set more rules. Isn't that what Religion really is all about anyway, making rules? 

I understand that so many people have so many opinions on interpretation, doctrine, and theology related to the Bible and their religion. But, it is a pattern that resonates through the ages. Everyone feels that they are correct, the others are all or mostly wrong, and they are going to hell because they do not believe as they do.

So what about Hell?? What is that all about?

to be continued...

DL

The Top Religious Groups in the World

Top 8 Religious Groups in the World 

I'll start today with some tables and charts showing the size of the top 8 World Religious Groups according to the Pew Research Center from 2010-12. ¹

     - Unaffiliated refers to agnostics, atheists, nonreligious, secular, humanists, and people who answered 'none'. Half of this group believe in a god, but are not religious.    
- Folk Religions include African traditional religions, Chinese Folk religions, Native American religions, and Australian Aboriginal religions.   
- Other Religions include the Baha’i faith, Taoism, Jainism, Shintoism, Sikhism, Tenrikyo, Wicca, Zoroastrianism and many others. 

Looking at these figures, we can see that over 82% of the world's population belong to one of the top five religious groups, excluding the unaffiliated group. If we add back in the half of those who say they believe in a god, we have over 90% of the world's population adhere to a religion or believe in a supernatural being!

Numbers of Adherents in each group  (2010)

• Christianity               2.1 Billion
• Islam                        1.6 Billion
• Unaffiliated              1.1 Billion
• Hinduism                 1.0 Billion
• Buddhism               487 Million
• Folk                        404 Million
• Other                        58 Million
• Judaism                   14 Million

    ^{Totals                    6.76 Billion          Estimated World Population 2010 - 6.9 Billion  2}

Definition of Religion (Merriam-Webster)

• the belief in a god or in a group of gods
• an organized system of beliefs, ceremonies, and rules used to worship a god or group of gods
• an interest, a belief, or an activity that is very important to a person or group.

So, looking at these figures, 9 out of 10 people in the world believe in a god, a supernatural being, or adhere to some belief or activity that is very important to them.

These are just some basic statistics about the world's religions and the enormous influence that religions have over people in the world. I use the word 'influence' because the majority of religions have some institutionalized system of beliefs, practices, views, convictions, rules, creeds, and ideology that its members follow, observe, and obey.

On this blog, I will be looking primarily at Christianity, since this is what I am most familiar with, but I will be addressing other religions as well in the future on my website origins of religions  HERE

The next Blog will ask and answer some questions as to why I am choosing to leave the religion of Christianity, even though the overwhelming majority of people in the world have belief in a religion.

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<sup>1. [Pew Research Center is a nonpartisan fact tank that informs the public about the issues, attitudes and trends shaping America and the world 1]↩
2. [Population Reference Bureau's 2010 World Population Data Sheet</sup>
-Accessed 06/13/16 -http://www.prb.org/Publications/Datasheets/2010/2010wpds.aspx 2]↩

What about Prayer?

Before I get back to my look at the world's religions, I want to talk briefly about prayer.

I been hearing a lot this week about people offering their prayers for the people involved in the horrible tragedy in the Orlando shooting. This got me to do some more thinking about prayers and their use in religions today.

As I go through my journey of de-converting from Christianity, I have been thinking about prayer and what are the reasons for even praying at all. I grew up with a Calvinist Protestant form of Christianity. The most common answer given for unanswered prayer that I remember is that it wasn't God's will.

Type in google why prayers are unanswered and hundreds of websites will pop up. Here are a few of the things I found:

One site says there are 4 categories of reasons for unanswered prayers

Spiritual sins - doubt, hypocrisy, pride, flippancy etc

Poor relationships - rudeness, unforgiveness, malice, anger, wrath, divisiveness.

Major sin - things categorized as "doing evil" 

Praying amiss - lack of persistence, not fasting, not using Jesus' name etc.

These categories form the basis for these reasons:

• you are not asking God in the first place but trying to obtain it by quarreling.
• you Ask wrongly e.g for worldly pleasures.
• you treat your wife in an inconsiderate manner.
• you are doing evil
• you have a flippant attitude to holy things.
• you are hypocritical  and attention-seeking.
• you are using vain repetition (e.g. like Buddhist prayer wheels etc).
• your lack of unity especially among Christian leaders.
• you lack of persistence
• you need to fasting in some situations
• you have spiritual pride
• you have wrath/anger
• it's not according to God's will (God's broad moral will is meant here)
• you live an erratic life that seldom "abides" in God.
• you are not asking "in Jesus name" i.e asking in the will and clear purposes of Jesus and with his designated authority.
• you do not believe in Jesus.

Wait, here are some more:

• you don't see that it's not God's will
• you have the wrong motives
• you are rebellious 
• you are living in sin
• you do not have fellowship with the Lord 
• you have a non-existent prayer life
• God could be protecting you from danger that you don't see coming
• you doubt God
• you need to learn humility so God didn't answer
• you pray hypocritical prayers to get attention
• sometimes God says 'no' or 'not yet' to bring greater glory to himself
• God is making you trust in him more
• God is in control
• you didn't ask
• you are not seeking to please God
• you have wavering faith
• you misunderstand your faith
• you're not ready
• the answer will hurt you
• you don't see that heaven is better
• you are not praying the right way
• you are too greedy; be more thankful
• your prayers are too small; don't be petty
• your prayers are too vague; be more specific
• your prayers are too public; pray in secret
• you don't spend enough time in prayer
• you are impatient
• your prayers are already answered; you just don't know it yet
• you are not reading the Bible enough
• your prayers are too long
• your prayers are too short
• you are holding a grudge against someone
• you have a lack of praise, thankfulness and love
• you fail to resist Satan
• you pray to other gods
• you refuse to do your part
• you are stingy in your giving
• you believe God is obligated to answer yes
• you have a lack of time
• you have bad family relationship

-These came from globalchristians dot org, biblereasons dot com, victorious dot org, cbn dot com,

crossmap dot com graceambassadors dot com ( I'm not giving them free back links to their websites!)

Had enough yet?  I could find a million more reasons God doesn't answer our prayers or says 'no'.

I hope I didn't repeat any, but have you noticed a pattern??

It's all about YOU and what YOU need to do! You don't do this, you don't do that. You don't believe this, you don't believe that. You do this, not that. 

The Grace Ambassadors page says this about why it's all about you:

"Notice most of the reasons start with ‘You’. When the prayer promises were given to Israel it was with covenantal strings attached. If they behaved, then God would bless them (and answer their prayer)."

Now I'm not a rocket scientist, but it seems to me that people (Christians) can come up with a gazillion reasons why prayer is not answered. And the underlying theme to almost all of their reasons is this: You need to do or not do something better or less, and then your prayers should be answered. It's all about behavior, rules, and faith!

So there you have it. You are the main reason your prayers are not answered. I tend to use a common sense approach to life and that is one reason that I have gone done this path of leaving Christianity. All of this doesn't make sense to me. God is supposed to be the supreme being who created the world and us. It this is so, is there anything that I can do as a human being to pacify this deity or gain his favor? 

According to these reasons in the list, I guess there is. It appears that WE are in control of our own destiny in prayers. Behave and you will get it! 

I do believe that we are in control of our own destiny, fate, future (whatever you want to call it) for the most part. Obviously things happen to us because of other people's actions, as it did in Orlando. But overall, we do control what happens to us. For example, you can choose to live like a hermit or a monk, and never leave your house, if you choose to have one. You can try to avoid other people and not be affected by their actions. This only works if you live on an island somewhere with no neighbors, cities, religions or countries to impose their desires on your life.

This is just one of my problems with Christianity. Follow the rules, believe and have faith and you will be fine. Don't, and you are destined to eternal damnation in a pit of fire with all your friends. Because the only ones who get everlasting happiness in a magical place called heaven, are those who behave and follow the rules.

BUT, what are the rules and who makes them??? 

I will tackle that at another time!

DL